funny response to are you still alive funny response to are you still alive

. There is no gray area (<brain matter joke): either you are brain-dead or you are not. Hey, whered you get that nose? You could reply with how you are doing and what has been keeping you busy lately. What's your sign? If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. I was gonna try #6 "Any finer I'd be China." I really thought you already knew. Like "I am not a Sunday morning inside four walls with clean blood and organized drawers. Because it sounds like some kind of automated message. You can put your foot in your mouth and your head up your ass at the same time! She works wit more, Harini Natarajan , Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner, Expertise: Relationships, Beauty & Lifestyle, Health & Wellness, As Head Of Content Operations, Harini sets the tone and editorial direction for StyleCraze to deliver engaging, interesting, and authentic content revolving around women's health, wellness, and beauty more. Ive had worse. Joshua Burns, "Death is a delightful hiding place for weary men." The best GIFs are on GIPHY. Taco Tuesday is pressure enough, I tell you! You don't want to be rude, but it's okay to give them a little sarcasm by using this phrase. When you show them how you're not affected by them at all, that's when your comedic skills become the best and make others laugh as well. Yes, believe it or not, it really does happen. Im telling you, the trash gets taken out more than me. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if Im not there, I carry on as usual." 70. What a miracle. When I eat cake, I flip it upside-down just so I can lick the icing off the plate! #19: Bumble comeback The best comeback text yet. TikTok video from Mark Winston (@markwinstonbball): "Are you still alive? Just Smile And Nod Maybe you said something so vile, so horrible, so disgusting that they no longer want to speak to you. I'd rather answer to a 'What's your favorite "I'd rather die" response alternative' thread on reddit. Tell me, how can I face my problems when the problem is my face? If they insist that they are bad at replying, you should unfollow them, because you are bad at following people who are bad at replying. I'm overqualified! Well, I'm old enough to beat you in a marathon. Im a little busy right now, but Id love the chance to ignore you some other time. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. You can fire back with a witty and flirty response. . Another way to say Still Alive? What? 9. Who knows, they might just do it. To read all future answers to your comment, please bookmark this page. I think it's a great response when you're possibly feeling cranky. Is my relationship status a joke to you?! 7. Im sorry. Blogging about a wide range of topics to help facilitate a better future. I dont follow boys/girls because theyre not my passion. Sometimes, it can be hard thinking on your feet, especially when youre joking around with your friends or in the midst of a heated exchange. 01 "I thought we were both adults but clearly, I was wrong. Funny Response to "What Are You Doing?" "I cry." Humor is about creating surprises. If you're really feeling them, you can give them one last chance to make up for their communication lag. Her sessions aim to bring about transformation in her clients lives, perspectives, and relationships. [Read: How to be funny and make someone laugh over text just by being YOU]. 14. 5. You might just find one. Its not my choice, but its still a choice. The police? If you have nothing to add and to share with a person, this saves their day, too. Could Be Payday. For some reason, some people think that not texting back is cool. Brian OldWolf (author) from Troon on July 30, 2020: Yes, this is a very witty, funny article. At the end of the day, if theyre not putting in the effort to let you know theyre not interested, theyre probably not worth your time. On a scale of 1 to 10, Id say somewhere between 1 and 10. My bed only has enough room for me and my dog. He was a good OP, of impeccable character. Real may recognize real, but real also recognizes thoughtless people who don't deserve your time. At least my hair looks amazing. Theyre not replying to you, but theyre posting on Twitter. Hopefully, youll stay there. You win the internet. Just look what happened there! While using humor and creativity in your responses is fun, ensure you steer clear from using puns related to religion and sensitive topics. You do the work of three men: Larry, Moe, and Curly. While I'd love to give you the technique behind his funny comeback I can't. He may simply be one of the quickest minds in the West. These comebacks are best for those situations where you dont just want to insult someoneyou want to own the room. I'd love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one. If you've been stuck inside doing chores and homework all day, and your parents ask you how you are, what response do they expect? Sounds like effort to me. Are you going to marry me? 84. 76. 40. I've come up with a compilation of funny and clever answers to the question Why are you still single?. 3. That will ensure there will be at least one man who will regret my death. Heinrich Heine (author), Fear of death increases in exact proportion to increase in wealth. Ernest Hemingway (author), Its funny the way most people love the dead. Plotting how Im going to take over the world. 2 I ask for your birth chart one time, and suddenly, I'm a mind-reading witch that knows what you're thinking. 24. Im glad that I sleep so peacefully, knowing that Im single and aint nobody cheating on me tonight. Too early to say, it hasnt finished yet. Here's a 13-second video explaining how Jennifer Lawrence uses this Surprise Theory: Happy, and I know it. | Are you surviving? Some people are going to find your witty responses funny, and some people arent. Youre about as sharp as a bowling ball. Just because you have a dick doesnt mean you need to act like one. Paul Levesque (Triple H), pro wrestler & VP at WWE "It's funny now because I'm kind of in this weird kind of combo twilight zone of the last bits of my in-ring . Not Bad. Stellar, great, fantastic but dead inside. Wait, are you my Superman/Wonder Woman? Same thing youre doing, talking to you now. Id smack you, but that would be animal abuse. Totally fine! is willie rogers of the soul stirrers still alive; cal berkeley football recruiting questionnaire; american housewife cancelled. Be grateful if it happens in that order. David Gerrold (author), Self-decapitation is an extremely difficult, not to say dangerous, thing to attempt. WS Gilbert (dramatist), I bequeath my entire estate to my wife on the condition that she marries again. Because you havent put a ring on it yet. 4. I am really just trying hard to avoid ambiguous questions at this moment. If you are not happy being single, then you will never be happy being in a relationship. After all, every single day that you're still alive is a good day overall. Finnish with this conversation! Because they are already taking their time. 86. Here's the good news: I've collected plenty of answer options for you to make that unbearably awkward question a little more bearable. Better inside than outside. In fact, theyre taking too much of it. Edgar A Shoaff (author), "Death is a very narrow theme, but it reaches a wide audience." (Heres What To Do), Roommate Sleeps in Living Room All The Time! Some people spend all their time on their phone. How impressive! So, it might be wise to double-check they're still alive before you complain. Maybe because I clap my hands when the credits roll at the end of a movie? By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. "Yeah, you're three years late. Id love to see things from your perspective, but its almost impossible to get my head up your ass that far. Whilst university does present some challenges, it does not mean you need to take several days to reply to a message.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[120,600],'grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_16',108,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[120,600],'grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_17',108,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-large-leaderboard-2-0_1');.large-leaderboard-2-multi-108{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:15px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:15px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:600px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. Its a shame you cant Photoshop your personality. Maybe the reply is just taking a long time to come back. How to respond to an ex asking how you are? How are you? I never even listen when you tell me them. How much do you charge to deliver an STD? Death is inevitablesome might even say it is a terminal inconvenience or a reason to suddenly stop sinning. Im in a loving, committed relationship with my bed. Well, are you? Because if you are, youre doing it right. I had been dead for billions of years before I was born and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience. Mark Twain (author), Im not afraid to die, I just dont want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen (comedian), The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry (author), Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. Yogi Berra (baseball player), Im very pleased to be here. Someday, you might actually say something intelligent. Now I have a much lower opinion of you. 2023 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. 53. You should eat some of that makeup, so you can be pretty on the inside. Maybe because I lick my plate clean after having a scrumptious meal. You may have noticed that I take a step back when we talk. You go first, lets see if mine was better or worse. Ill get back to you tomorrow when the results are in. Have a nice life." This text is excellent because you are making him or her feel guilty about ghosting you. 3. parkerbilly 3 yr. ago. But, you should know that, I don't like you, already. You dont need to say it. Ive seen your kind before but last time, I had to pay admission. Every civilisation has its genesis and its conclusion. So, ditch the mechanical responses and adopt the witty and fun replies to keep the conversations exciting! This one gets to the point of what they want to know, it's humorous, and it makes ya think. I dont know. To text, most of us need our thumbs. 59. I havent met the right one yet. Youll go far someday. Doing fairly well, unless you have some contagious disease and are about to infect me . "Tony, I'm here to be for you what someone once was for me. 20 Warning Signs You Are In A Codependent 20 Warning Signs You Are In A Codependent Relationship. If I wanted to commit suicide, Id climb your ego and jump to your IQ level. 28. Here, there are hilarious replies, witty comebacks, flirty responses, and many other answers to this question. You may join me, though. By acting as though they are replying too fast, you highlight the fact that they are replying too slow. Are you flirting with me right now? The data will take longer to reach Earth than it would if it was sent from someone on Earth. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. No, I'm Finnish. 5 Opening Texts She HAS to Respond To (And Why) 1) "Hey, it's that really charming, irresistible guy from last night" 2) "How's your week looking? People tend to ask the same questions whenever you see them, which is why you should have a few different replies to "How are you?" Humans are sophisticated beings, but we are also creatures of habit who say one thing while we mean something else. Do you really care? "Fine" is a boring conversation-killer. Is it your job to spread ignorance? [Read: 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass!]. This way, youre insulting themand they just might be dumb enough not to notice. It's all about confidence. Your hair looks great! 55. 91. Its good to see youre not letting education get in the way of your ignorance. 52. Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace: What Does It Mean? Through humorous musings about Scalia's . But half the time, it is a nightmare. 26. Thats the biggest joke Ive heard recently. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. 82. 11. Hemali is an ICF-Certified ACC Level Life Coach with 3 years of experience in relationship, marriage, and grief coaching. Over The Phone or On The Phone Which is Correct? I'm alive! I only went to the gym four times instead of my usual five." Sarcastic response: "Yeah totally. How dare you assume such a thing just a confusing remark. There is not always a need to be so funny, witty, or clever. 13. Otherwise, how are people going to get the message that you dont want to keep answering the same questions with the same half-hearted answers? 11. Feeling confident? One common excuse that people come up with when they take a while to reply is Im bad at replying. You're the reason God created the middle finger. I dont chase them just to satisfy my sexual desires. If you are in a coma, on the other hand, you are legally very much alive. I only fall in love with anime characters. but that was before I read Fred's comment below. Privacy Policy. Brian OldWolf (author) from Troon on January 20, 2020: Shing Araya from Philippines on January 08, 2020: All are witty and funny at the same time. Life is up to something. Well, I was trying to be invisible but I guess that didnt work.